“February is the uncertain month, neither black nor white, but all shades between by turns. Nothing is sure.” - Gladys Hasty Carroll
Hello you.
Let’s just jump right in, ok?
But, slowly, of course. We are still in those quiet, waking moments of pre-dawn. Still in winter, but on the edges of it now. The light is growing and energy is gathering. Still, there is no rush. In fact, this week, the last week of February, ends with a dark new moon on the very last day of this month. And that creates a very special, slow, reflective mood for the week ahead. The perfect way to wind down this month and to reset before a new one.
Let’s set the tone even more with the card of the week.
The card for the week ahead is the Leaves card. The exact same card that turned up for the last week of January. While it carries the same energy as a month ago, it offers me a completely different message. That’s the beauty and magic of oracle cards, I believe. They are simply guideposts to help me listen to and feel what my intuition wants me to know at this time, on this day, at the close of this month.
And, for the last week in February, as the month culminates with a new moon, the message is one of introspection and reflection. A chance to look back over the month and let all that has happened begin to settle and integrate. An opportunity to see what has been growing and beginning to move in the deep, underground, hidden parts in our souls. The leaves card is a reminder that everything moves in cycles and rhythms, and that, as February draws to a close, it is time to begin to create some space in which to see the progress that has been made, release the days and moments that have passed, and ready ourselves to step into the new energy of a new month.
February has been the month of the earthworm. A month of purifying, clarifying, and clearing out. Where we, like the earthworm, are engaged in important, essential work that prepares our soul (the soil) for the rebirth of spring, the abundance of the summer, and the harvest of autumn. What will grow as the months and seasons unfold? Did I use January to rest and hibernate as much as I could? Have I spent this month doing the silent, underground work of preparing for the active, brighter half of the year and the arrival of spring?
As February wanes, the week ahead is the perfect time to check in with ourselves and take a little time to notice both the big moments and tiny movements that have happened throughout this month. A reminder that, even though we don’t see it all, there is so much happening deep down in the earth of our souls. This week is one last chance to bask in the soft, quiet, stirrings of February’s pre-dawn energy. And slowly allow ourselves to awaken to the more active seasons of the year, which are just around the corner.
This week is a call to align with the reflective, waning energy of the moon and create some space to gather all of the lessons and moments of this month in and let them infuse our souls with their wisdom and magic.
February has been a month filled with all the feelings. Which makes for an intense time of reflection and introspection. But, by taking the time to feel all of my feels, I am gifted with the wisdom of my own soul. That sounds bold and a bit egotistical, I know. But, only by allowing myself some time to let the memories and moments of this month become a part of me, can I hear the whispers of my soul, the wisdom of my ancestors, and the messages that my intuitive self has for me. It is only in the quietness of solitude and silence that I can find the discernment and guidance that I need in order to help me find my way forward.
Of course, I need and want the thoughts and guidance of other people in my life. But, I am the the one who has to do the reflective, introspective work. I am the one who needs to do the hidden groundwork, make the decisions, and take the steps forward that lead me toward the life that I want to live. And, I can only make those decisions and take those steps when I dare to feel my feelings and reflect on where I’ve been, where I am, and where I want to go.
I’m going to be so bold as to share with you a bit of all of my feels right now - and I do this because I know that writing about it, and speaking about it, helps me in understanding what I am really feeling and why. Sharing my thoughts and feelings clarifies and cleanses my mind. It put things in perspective. And often gives me exactly the answers I am looking for, which is why I love writing and podcasting so much. It is a purely selfish and narcissistic act of love for myself. *wink wink*
But, laying my soul open on the page or speaking it out into the universe is also a way to let you know, perhaps, that you are not alone, should you ever find any inspiration, relevance, or kindredness in what I share. And, from the deepest parts of my heart, I hope that my words create something - a feeling of coziness, a sense of community, a twinge of hope.
So, what am I feeling as February winds down? What are you feeling?
For the past 5 years, February has grown into a deeply difficult month for me. But, I think it has always been a weirdly transitional month. It feels very otherworldly, floating mysteriously between deep winter and the beginning of spring. A month when I have often felt a bit lost, not really knowing what to make of it. And, as I said before, a month that has recently become very challenging and emotional.
This year has been no different, to be honest. But, I think that I have been different. I suppose that I have accepted things as they come a bit better than in the past - thank goodness for aging and wisdom. I have taken it very slow. And I have leaned into whatever feelings I have felt.
February has been dark and tough, as usual, leaving me feeling the heaviness of worry and grief. A family member who is in her last days and another one going through a tough procedure. A mass shooting that shook Sweden to its core. Sharing memories with a friend about the loss of his loved one/our free-spirited local pizza guy to cancer. Worrying intensely about what is happening in the US and how it affecting us globally. Days spent remembering my grandparents and my dad as I created a home altar. Missing my dad so much. A week of being sick and at home in bed. The anniversaries of the deaths of one of my soulmates two years ago and my baby girl four years ago. Grieving the loss of a dream.
But, as it is in life, especially in February, light has also broken through. We celebrated our one year Beariversary (adoption day of Bear the cat). A young woman from my past come for a visit and we talked about ALL the things and reconnected things in ways that I am still trying to understand. My love sang incredible solos at two different concerts. We went to a jazz tribute to Nina Simone and left more inspired than we’ve been in a while. I spent an hour Face-timing with my cousin in NYC and it was pure bliss. It’s been winter break this week and I slowed it way down.
The days have been dreary, cold, and gray. But, there have also been bright frigid days with the Nordic sunshine’s warm winter rays. February has brought it all.
As I stop and reflect, I am closing out this month, as of right now at least, feeling deeply moved. Or maybe just feeling deeply. Feeling everything. But, somehow, there is always an underlying current, a foundational feeling, of hope. The hope that exists because of the rhythms of life and cycles of the seasons that keep me grounded and also always moving forward. My feelings come and go, they ebb and flow, wax and wane. But, no matter the feeling that I feel in any given moment, or any month or season of the year, the inner presence of love and the cosmic truth of hope always remain.
In February, perhaps we’re meant to feel it all. Like the delicate snowdrops budding and blooming surrounded by ice and snow. Perhaps February really is everything all at once, as we move the messiness of the transition of the seasons. A lesson that we might carry with us all year long. There is space for it all.
Spring is closer now. Renewal and rebirth are soon here. The light half of the year is almost upon us. Its just a few weeks away now.
So, hold on, my friend. Dare to feel it all this week as you begin to let go of February and prepare yourself to welcome a new month with new energy under the magic of the new moon next weekend.
Until then, bask in the otherworldly, mystical, airy mood of February’s liminal light for one more week.
xoxo. liz.
Sacred Days + Folk Festivals this week
28 February - New Moon in Pisces
February playlist - for one more week
The earth is awakening from winter’s deep sleep, but it is not yet spring. Still, underground, there are stirrings. And light is slowly returning. Feel the gentle, sleepy predawn energy and the very first soft hint of the hope of spring.
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